What are you made to do?

“Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life” Confucius

Since my 12 year old is beginning to drive the ball over 250 yards, I began to think of the “ifs” in life. “What If” I would have started golfing at that age? You know the thought process. You begin the “what ifs”!

I called my brother today to borrow his truck and we talked about his new job. My brother is a well liked musician in our community. He is less than a year younger than I am, so we shared a lot of the same friends growing up and the same dysfunctional family. My mom was married and divorced three times and we moved on an average of every six months. We went to six different elementary schools. My mother was a single mom trying to feed and clothe two growing boys, so she worked a lot. So my brother and I were alone a lot.

My brother and I talked about his new position and its perks and the many jobs we have had. As we talked about those different jobs, I mentioned to him why I thought he and I have had so many jobs. The conversation of jobs started because the person that set him up for the new position had been on the same job for 30 years which ignited the talk of why?  We talked a little about why he may have been there since he began his career. But, I have learned something over the past several years, not only about myself, but others as well.

These past few years I have made it a point to study and ask men why they do the job they do and what motivated them to do that particular job. You would be surprised and may be aware of some of the answers. “I got this job, because I just needed a job”, or “I am in the family business, but I am still looking for my dream job”, or “I got my girlfriend pregnant and I have to save up for our wedding and baby stuff”, etc… The list is long and you may have one that caused you to get the job you have right now.

When you grow up in a family like I did, you begin a certain lifestyle not even trying, it just becomes a part of your personality or your, “Shape”! Now I know in today’s job market it’s a little different and that job hopping is kind of the normative. But, why is that? Our culture is shifting and you will need to know something very important to succeed in your walk through life. You need to know what you were called or shaped to do. Many folks today are doing a job because of obligation, not because they first set out with the goal in mind to live the dream that was put into their heart.

It is so fulfilling to help a person, especially a young person, set their sails in the right direction. Now, I’m not sure if my boy is suppose to be or is going to be a PGA Tour golfer, but he sure has the tools at such a young age…and a dad who can’t wait to help him achieve his success. Like all golfers, they all have different swings that seem to match their personality. If I could talk with you right now, I would ask you these questions:

What are you doing for a vocation?

Are you happy doing it?

Is it adding value to others?

What is your dream?

How will you achieve your dream?

If you are not doing what you were meant to do, will you look into changing your direction? Or, what am I meant to do? These are very important and life “giving” questions that can not only make an impact on your life, but more importantly, on others. What you do for a “living” makes a difference in others lives, which in turn can effect a whole community or maybe even our culture or farther out into other communities. Remember, your decisions for a career, not only effect your present status, but they have an effect on others futures also!

“Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy” Leo Buscaglia

I’m not normally a person persuaded by faces that pop on toast and clouds that could have a meaning written on them, but I was asked to look at something from one of my relatives who is a sweet innocent 28 year old. Sheri has been a very serious person of faith since she has been 4 years old. Her mother was recently diagnosed with cancer and has been flying to Chicago for treatment. Since she has found out about her cancer, the whole family has made the shift from part time Christian to fulltime follower. Prayer has become a normal family activity and they have experienced a lifestyle of learning to walk in faith.

Last night at “The Old Spaghetti Factory”, Sheri began to explain a story to me that she thought I might think a little weird, but felt comfortable enough to tell me about it. Our conversations always turn spiritual and this time was no different. She said she was talking with God during breakfast and asked for strength for her mom and to be healed of her ailment. As she was having her breakfast, she noticed something on a piece of her cereal, it was a cross. She had just been asking God to provide since He is “The Bread of Life”, when she noticed the cross on the one Chex cereal. As I mentioned, I don’t usually get too involved with these kinds of things, but I was interested and knew that this might be a little different. You see, Sheri is a “Worry wart”. She constantly worries just about everything and also cares a great deal about people and their welfare. As we talked about this strange phenomenon, I thought of what it meant to her. I spoke of her worrying and the worrying that she does takes her focus away from God. That this cross was for her to focus on Jesus and not the problem.  Jesus spoke many times about worrying. We can do nothing in worry, except take our minds to places they don’t need to be. I like this little cross on a piece of cereal which in reality is bread. Jesus called Himself the bread of life. Considering He was born in Bethlehem, which in the Hebrew means, “The House of Bread”. Many ancient cities were named by what they did, which in this case the maker of life which is the bread of life, was born in the house of bread. Remember the next time you worry, Jesus wants to be your source. Hebrews 12:2 “keeping our eyes on Jesus, the source and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that lay before Him endured a cross and despised the shame and has sat down at the right hand of God’s throne.

One of the crazy things about this piece of cereal, is once it was photographed the cross vanished from the cereal. Sheri wanted to save it, but as soon as she took the photo it was gone. Kind of like the bread that fell from Heaven in the desert for the Hebrews once they were free from the bondage of slavery from the Egyptians. This bread was known as “Manna”. The Manna would only last one day, so the Hebrews could not store it, but had to depend on fresh delivery daily. A reminder for us, that we need to depend on Him daily.

No Pain No Gain

“The Holy book of the living God suffers from its exponents today than from its opponents” Leonard Ravenhill

Do you remember when you were a 12 year old going to your first week of football practice for the season? The first week is over and my boy is very sore. He thought he was “in shape” and he would just breeze through the first week of conditioning camp. I taught the final day of the quarter today at your local mission to the men in the recovery program and relayed a short story to them about my boy and this week in practice. I can always relate a story that parallels life and sports.

Since my boy is still learning about life and how to maneuver through the daily tasks of football practice, golf practice, Karate and playing with his friends, he still has not grasped why it hurts when you use muscles you thought were already “in shape”. As I talked with the men about working out and studying their bibles, I asked them how many of them worked out regularly. It was obvious that a few of them lifted weights because of their physiques. But, the ones who didn’t, I asked them if they thought that by knowing one of the guys who worked out that it would help them build their muscle. I know it’s a very obvious question, but I asked it any way. Of course they said, “No”. So I asked them, “Than how can you expect to change your life by watching others?” The class I teach is called spiritual formation. We go through the book of John in 14 weeks. The guys are responsible for reading two chapters a week that we will be watching in the coming week and write down what is going on and how they can apply it to their lives through a simple method called S.O.A.P. (Scripture, Observation, Application, Prayer). When done correctly, it can take a person about 15-30 minutes a day to complete the exercise. This activity helps develop a habit that can change a person from the inside. Just like working out once every few months can make you sore, studying your bible in the same way can cause a sore relationship with the Lord. Do yourself a huge favor, begin studying your bible daily, it will change your life!  Proverbs 3:1-2 “My son, do not forget my teaching, but let your heart keep my commandments, for length of days and years of life and peace they will add to you”.

Short game…it’s that important!

“Game management is accomplished by staying constantly alert and then reading and reacting to potential problem situations before they materialize. It all boils down to paying attention to details” Jim Evans

If 65% of amateurs shots are 100 yards and in, what are you doing to lower your scores? In this short segment, we’ll clarify one thing…you must have a short game in order to have lower scores. Every teacher, coach and pro alike will tell you that you must work on your shots from 100 yards and in to get lower scores. I have a friend that I like to play scrambles with. He used to teach golf at a private club, but moved on to make more money for his family. His name is Joe. Joe drives the golf ball incredibly long and is always in the fairway. So with that, it gives us a huge advantage in any scramble. His average drive is 360 yards, yep that’s right 360! But Joe has a hindrance, his short game is not consistent and he has another problem, he doesn’t work on that part of his game. He doesn’t spend a lot of time practicing with his new job, and when he does he only works on his strengths. Most of us would love to just keep the ball in the fairway, much less be able to drive the ball 360 regularly.

One reason we like to play in scrambles together beside our friendship, is that the short game is my strength and I work on my short game regularly and we take advantage of it in tournaments. I don’t hit the driver far enough for scrambles but I am usually in the fairway, so my drives are usually used as a safety net. 260 won’t win you tournaments, but neither will 360. If the short game is the weak part of your game, than you need to change your routine on the practice range. You will need to spend at least 50% of your practice time working on your short game. Pete Rose was asked once by a reporter a question that went something like this, “why did you excel in every area of your baseball career?” His answer was, “why everybody is working on their strengths, I’m working on my weak areas”. He went on to talk about how so many guys spent way too much time working on their strengths while not getting better in areas that needed help to propel their overall performance. Now, you may not like Pete Rose, but there is wisdom in that statement. I don’t hit the ball very long, but I have a very good short game and long iron game that will off-set my lack of distance.

One thing about life and golf, is that we have strengths and weakness in our lives. It’s all about the details. I am not a detail person at all. But with golf, I have learned the importance of details. Those little subtleties make a huge difference. One stroke there and one here can make or break a round of golf. Like golf, life is full of details. The more we pay attention to details, the more successful the task may become. Golf and life are full of details. Make sure you pay attention to them so you can not only become a better golfer, but better at life. What details are you looking at in your walk through life?

Finish well…that is what golf and life are all about!

“We rate ability in men by what they finish, not by what they attempt”

Isn’t golf a crazy and wild thing? It has many similarities to life. We watched Tiger lead the first few days and end up not even in the hunt. The leaders new they needed to finish strong, but faltered. Web Simpson had a strong finish and came out as the 2012 U.S. Open Champion.

The U.S. Open is considered the toughest test of golf and you could see the players grind all day. One mistake could cost you the whole tournament. For a few of the players, it did. I like to parallel golf with life. During our journey in life we will have mistakes, failures and sometimes the “ball” will bounce our way. The toughest part of playing in the Open is the mental aspect. Our minds are the most important part of our bodies. It sets the tone for our life. The bible tells us in Romans 12:2 “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is —his good, pleasing and perfect will.” Just like golf, we will need to change the way we think. I’m watching a news piece right now about golf and football. Our new college football coach is saying, “We are going to play tough fundamental football”. It’s always the proper fundamentals that help propel us in life and more importantly our walk in life. We must have a proper thought process in order to be successful in our walk with God. Are you “renewing your mind”?

The apostle Paul had to change his mind from a “Christian killer “, to a “Kingdom builder.” Paul understood and practiced this fundamental principle. Paul talked of finishing the race in his second letter to Timothy in chapter 4:7. He understood that no matter what you have done in the past, you can still finish well.  Just like a good golf swing, you must have a good finish. A good finish sometimes reveals what you have done with the rest of your swing. A good finish in your life will show what you have done to get to that point!

Discussion questions:

1.    What are you putting in your mind?

2.    Who are you getting fundamental information from?

3.    How are you finishing?

Happy Fathers Day!

Preparation, Tiger, = Winning

“The will to win is important, but the will to prepare is vital” Joe Peterno

I love to practice, how about you? One of the hardest things for a lot of us to do is practice. For most golfers, that is not a fun word. Some of my golf friends hate to practice and some of them want to be better golfers. Occasionally you run across a person who never practices and still plays well. But it’s rare and if they want to compete, they will need to practice. If you have read any of the hype this weekend for the U.S. Open, Tiger is at the top of the sports writers pens. Tiger has prepared for this all of his life. He has prepared himself to win and his father has been there to prepare him for these occasions. Winners don’t win because they are not prepared. Preparation is “vital”! Like life, golfers and all athletes, business people, chefs, you name it, performance comes from preparation. I am trying to figure out a way to get my 12 year old to enjoy practice. He has some skills that I think can get him to a level of excellence in golf, he just doesn’t grasp what that it is yet. I have worked with him over the past few years and he is out driving most of the men we play with and it’s very exciting for me as a father. My job as a father is to not only prepare him for sports, school and other activities he takes part in, it is my job to prepare him for life through helping him with his character. If you come from a fatherless childhood as I did, you may know what it feels like. You understand some of the emotional setbacks and lack of communication skills in family matters or relationship deficiencies. If you have been stumbling in your life journey and you are looking for answers, just remember, there is someone who wants to walk with you through the tough times as well as the good ones. This father’s day, remember that our heavenly father is always there for the fatherless and will help us prepare for life!

Golf is a Process: Persevering in Trials and Pain “Out of suffering h...

Golf is a Process: Persevering in Trials and Pain “Out of suffering h...: Persevering in Trials and Pain “ Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.” ...

Persevering in Trials and Pain

“Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.” Khalil Gibran

Another weekend of golf is in the books. Dustin Johnson won on the PGA tour with consistent play at a difficult course and a well playing host of other world ranked players. But the story I took from this weekend was from a player that I have known since elementary school, Bill Glasson. Bill lead the first two days of the “Champions tour” and finished tied for fourth. Bill was always known for his athletic skills before he began to play golf. Bill and I played football together as he was the QB and I was the running back. But, once he moved on to middle school he played basketball and played it very well. What held him from moving on in that sport was his health. He had knee problems at an early age so he took up golf. We all thought it was crazy, but we didn’t know that golf was a real sport. We were just kids so we didn’t know anything about it except that the football players didn’t play golf, “It was for sissy’s”!

My take on this weekend’s play from Bill was that he has not been able to play a full season healthy and pain free since the mid 80’s. He came on the scene and in the first few years he had turned professional, he had won seven tournaments and was on his way to elite status. But the injuries began to pile up. After 25 surgeries on his body, you might think he would have put the golf clubs down. But Bill is a grinder. He showed up this weekend after his last few seasons under the knife for a back surgery. In his interview he was asked if he was a 100%. He laughed and said, "Are you kidding? What's that? I'm better than I've been, but I still have to take that Percocet every day when I play, my Advil and everything else. I'm trying to cut back, but I'm just not there and I don't know what the answer is. It just continues to be lingering. "But let's face it, we're all hurt out here. Some not as much as others, but everybody's hurt. We just try to get through." (Read the whole article here, http://www.pgatour.com/2012/tournaments/s558/06/07/rd1-story/index.html)

I know something about Bill and you can see it if you have followed his career, Bill is driven to succeed. I think his athletic skill and instincts are secondary to his drive and will to compete. Even as kids, we saw him excel. We didn’t really understand it, but we watched it and we all talked about it, especially as he began winning tournaments at young ages.

We enjoy stories of the “Bills” out there! He never complains about his injuries and circumstances, he just seems to persevere. Bills story may be like yours or maybe a friend or co-worker that you know. Everyone goes through trials and tests. In John 16:33 Jesus said, “In this world you will have trouble…” (NIV) Now that may sound negative to you, but one thing about Jesus, He never sugar coated anything and He never was afraid to walk with a person through a trial. One of the most asked questions by skeptics, atheists and even believers is this question, “why does God allow suffering?”  I heard a true story of a woman who had a daughter that suffers from an extremely rare disorder called “congenital insensitivity”.  If you are not sure what it is, it’s a disorder where a person feels no physical pain. Now, you may be thinking that could be a cool “Super human power” or something like that, but it is very bad, especially for a child. The person could be hurt badly and not even know it even to the point of causing their own death. So they have to be monitored. What I would like you to think about is this, the mother of the girl prayed for her daughter to feel pain. Does that seem like a strange prayer? What would you want in this situation? I don’t like hurting. I wish I had that disorder when my back went out. But if I would have had the disease I could have caused more damage to my back and a possibility to become paralyzed. I think you may now understand the physical need for pain. It protects us from further damage to our complex body’s.

I have learned over the years that pain is a time to learn and refocus and sometimes it’s a time for us to change. Like Bill, he has worked around and prepared himself for the pain that he suffers to play a game that has brought him financial success and has learned a lot of different life lessons through the pain along the way. Sometimes we have to move forward through a difficult trial to propel our future or someone else’s. There are millions of stories of people that have used very difficult situations to help them in areas they may have never been in unless there was pain involved. Human suffering is a teacher that can help us in just about every area of our lives. If you have pain and suffering in a difficult measure, find someone you can turn to for help. Suffering is a time for human interaction and forging character!

Discussion questions;                                                                                                     

1.    If you are suffering, where are you going for help?

2.    Is it building a foundation for positive change?

3.    Are you helping others through your suffering?

4.    Are you helping others who suffer?

Failures become Opportunities!

Yesterday was another day in history for golf and golf fans. Tiger won in Tiger like fashion. Not only did he win, but he did in the way we have become accustomed to him winning. His come from behind charge with his laser like iron play, his putting prowess and his miraculous flop shot on 16. Similar to his shot at the Masters a few years ago. If you are anything like me, you may not care for his off the course behavior, but you enjoy great golf! He is beginning to silence his critics now that he is back on track to winning. A lot of people, experts included, said he would never be what he once was, but maybe, just maybe, he will pass Jack’s record. He tied Jack Sunday, ironically at Jacks course.

There is one thing I have begun to learn in life, is that failures can become opportunities. If you are a regular blogger you have more than likely heard of Seth Godin. He said in an interview that, “if when I fail more than you, I’ll win”. And Godin began to talk about the “Mindset of a Winner”. I have read plenty of books on failure, but this statement caught me by surprise and spoke to me in a way no other “Failure” statement has. Like Tiger, all though we don’t really think of him as a failure, had a rough last three or so years in his life, not only as a professional golfer but more importantly, his personal life. I don’t know him personally, but I watched him struggle with his game because of his personal failure. If you have been through some sort of past or even present failure in your walk through life lately, be prepared to walk through the process that will present itself.  Life is a process. Pain and mistakes are a part of it. Part of the process is getting back up and moving forward. Tiger knows and understands this and yesterday was an indication of how hard it is to get back up and move forward. Even though Tiger is a wealthy and has some status that you and I don’t have, it doesn’t mean that what he went through didn’t cause emotional pain in his life. It is obvious by where his game has been the last few years. Tiger has taken the “opportunity” to work on his game to get better. How about you?

If you have been through a rough spot in your life’s journey, what are you doing to move forward in your walk? I have learned over the years and the type of people I work with that it is not good for us to stay in our problems. It’s not good for us to isolate ourselves from others. Did you know healing comes from others? Sometimes we will need some alone time to “re-group and re-focus” and look at our self and find the problem. But the best advice I found was from a coach, mentor, pastor, or someone wiser than us or a really good friend to help us repair and asses what the damages are. It’s never a good thing to asses ourselves when you are emotionally torn. Every time we go through a trail in life it is an opportunity to grow.

If you have ever been to Florida, you may have noticed some of the crazy shaped palm trees. They bend into some shapes that just don’t seem to make sense. I learned something about palm trees. We are familiar with the Hurricanes we hear about in Florida, or maybe you have been in some shelter somewhere during one. One thing you will notice after a Hurricane, after you look through all of the debris of sometimes cars overturned, homes torn apart and lifted from their foundations, trees uprooted and blown sometimes miles from where they were planted, the palm trees are still rooted. They may be bent over and in a weird shape, but they are still rooted and flourishing and producing their fruit. We need to be like the palm tree. The storms of life will come. Will you be like the tree that was up-rooted and found miles away or will you be like the palm tree, adjusting and bending to the storms of life and continue to produce fruit? You will grow where you are planted!

Question;

1.    What foundation do you have for life?

2.    Are you producing fruit?

3.    What or who informs you?